Tas and Joisy Vs The Queen of Clubs
by TraumaticVampiress
Summary: A birthday tribute for Tas the Toon Mouse! After a friendly game of Go Fish, Tas and Joisy suddenly find themselves in a different dimension; In the Palace of the Queen of Clubs.
1. Chapter 1

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

Hey, guys! Today's my birthday, and my long-time friend, Joisy, came to spend the day with me. She's almost twenty years old, her birthday is this month, too. On Valentine's Day. But that's alright because some older people are pretty cool.

I leaned on the Gazebo in Toontown Central. I wonder what was taking her? Maybe her car broke down. Last I heard from her it does that alot nowadays.

I finally saw her come through Loopy Lane, running towards me. Lavender hair flowing in the wind. She ran up to me, panting only slightly so that she could catch her breath.

"My.. Car.. Broke.. Down."

"Hey, no problem." I patted her on the back. "Sooo.. Whatcha get me?"

She reached into the back pocket of her denuim skirt and pulled out a box of playing cards.

Cards isn't exactly my ideal gift, but I don't blame her that picking out the perfect gift would be hard, considering how long it's been. I remember playing this game with her when I was younger.

"Aww man! I love it!" I tried acting excited, taking them from her and giving her a quick hug.

"Do you want to play?" The purple cat asked.

I nodded.

"I hope you're ask good as you used to be," Joisy told me. "I've been playing Solitare alot recently."

I usually did beat her at this game.

I emptied out the box and began shuffling the cards. You know, arch shape, down on eachother, and tossing them in and out of the stack. I dealed seven cards to each of us and put the stack in the middle. I went first.

"Got any Twos?"

Joisy shook her head. "Go fish."

I drew a Three.

"Got any Queens?" She asked.

"Go fish." I replied.

It turns out that as usual, I won eight to six.

"That was a good game, Tas." Joisy declared. We fist bumped, but thats when things got strange...

My pile of pairs began to glow blue, and a portal opened up next to us. I felt myself begin to be sucked in.

"Tas!" Joisy grabbed onto me, just before we were sucked in.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

I found us next to the inside entrance of some sort of palace. I let go of Tas and looked around, until a figure emerged from the shadows. I braced myself, sliding my feet into a fighting stance with Tas following my lead.

The figure was a black cat, and no ordinary one. One her head was black, transparent club, and on her chest was a white breastplate of a large club and a "Q" in the corner. Her skirt was made up of many Queen of Clubs cards, and even her tail had a kink at the end of the shape of a club.

"Who dares step foot on my turf?" She boomed, drawing a Kris from her breastplate.

Tas tried not to stare. "She didn't!"

"She did.." I shook my head. How? I would never know.

_**"Your Majesty, these two appear unfit to be able to overthrow your Queendom."**_

"The blade spoke.." Tas whispered.

"Unfit? UNFIT?" I marched forward. "Do you know who I am?"

_**"A simpleton?"**_ The blade replied.

I laughed ruefully. "I'm the Empress of a great empire. And incase you didn't know.." I got dangerously close to them. "An Empress ranks higher than a _Queen._" I poked the maiden on the nose.

The queen growled.

I did a backflip and pulled my charm from my pocket, flipping it with the rush of battle, transforming into the grand samurai.

Tas took the hint and took a hoop from his pocket, dropping it on the ground and stepping into it. He began to glow and picked the hoop back up as he floated a few inches off the ground.

The queen charged at me with her Kris. I countered it, lifting up _Otetsudai_.

_**"They seem to be stronger then I first suspected,"**_ The Kris commented.

_**"Don't judge a sword by its sheath."**_ _Otetsudai_ replied.

Tas rammed into the queen, knocking her down.

"Run!" He shouted, grabbing my arm.

We darted around the nearest corner and down a hallway. Hearing footsteps, Tas turned us invisible.

"Look.." I squeaked.

Ten other black cats marched down the halls, their clothing altered compared to the queen's, but still made up of playing cards and clubs, being lead by a Ten and ending with an Ace.

"What dimension is this?" Tas wondered outloud.

"Well.. It doesn't seem as bad as any hellhole Princess Domino could have come up with.."

"I heard about her.." The mouse whispered. "I hope she's locked up for a long time... Now then, where's the exit?"

•°•Queen of Clubs' Perspective•°•

"Damn.." I winced, getting up. "Those two could really pack a punch. That _rat_ especially."

_**"Not to mention that woman-cat and her Katana."**_ My Kris, Damien, replied.

"Hmmph.. It sounds like the knights are coming."

I waited until they came marching down the hall. I stopped them. "Have any of you seen a glowing rat and a metal cat?"

"No, Ma'am." They replied in unison.

"Well, then, carry on. And you." I stopped the Ace. "Work harder."

She nodded, and then the group continued patrolling the perimeter.

_**"They must be here somewhere.."**_ Damien commented.

"We'll just have to worry about that later." I said, sliding him back into my breastplate. "Let's just hope that they didn't paint my lotuses black."


	2. Chapter 2

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

Joisy and I were no longer invisible, nor were we in our more powerful forms.

"Did you notice how that Kris said "Queendom" and not "Kingdom"?" Joisy asked me while we continued to walk around aimlessly, still looking for a way out.

I gulped. "Does that mean that they all died?"

"I don't know," Joisy replied. "But all of those knights we saw earlier were female, too."

I stopped, but Joisy continued walking a few feet.

"Joisy, did you see any Kings when we were playing cards before?" I asked dryly.

She stopped dead. Two arms out like she had been jogging, one on the ground, and one out behind her."N-No.."

"This is creepier than Lawbot HQ," I said, only to get an emotionless look from Joisy. "No offense, sorry."

"It's fine," She said. "Without the Lawbots it isn't even Lawbot HQ anymore... Now then. I have a plan."

"Well, I would be glad to hear it." I told her.

"Moss usually grows on the northside of a tree, right?"

"Yeah... So what?"

"Sooo if we can find some moss, we can use it as a compass to navigate around this place."

"Sounds good to me," I decided.

Around the next corner, there was another large door with a wooden flowers on it. I used all my strength to pry it open a crack so we could make it through.

"Say, this is a garden!" I observed, looking around at the neatly trimmed grass, hedges, and rows of clovers. Not to mention the single pile of cedar wood chippings with white flowers growing in them. "This looks out of place." I said, bending down beside them.

"We should paint them black!" Joisy cheered.

"Now, why would we do that?" I asked.

"Haven't you seen the movies?" Joisy asked. "I don't remember the name but in this one movie, a girl was in the Queen of Hearts' garden and painted her white roses red like they were supposed to be."

"Yes, and she nearly got be-headed!" I defended.

"Well then," Joisy said. "I'll just have to do it myself." She drew a fountain pen from her pocket and aimed it at the lotuses, pulling the trigger.

I quickly jumped out of the way to dodge her inky ammo. "Classic cog move," I said.

"Now, that that's out of my system, let's continue looking for moss."

I nodded, standing up. Joisy turned around and continued walking a short few feet to where a white fountain of the queen stood. I studied it for a moment and then asked Joisy for her pen. When she gave it to me, I used it to draw a mustache on the queen. We then rounded the next corner and stepped in a gap between the hedge rows.

"Oh my drop!" Joisy cried.

"DUDE!" I stepped back.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

Before us was a skeleton with moss growing on it with a few Jack of Clubs cards forced into the ribcage.

"Snooping around, are we?"

We turned to face the queen herself.

"And painting my lotuses black, just as I suspected.." She narrowed her eyes.

"Send in the Sevens!" She cried. And as she did so, three Sevens marched in. One on each side of us, and one in the middle, removed us from the garden and walked us threw the palace until we came across a smaller wooden door with a bared window. It had a pattern of a brick wall on it, which made me think "dungeon".

They opened this door and brought us threw, walking up to the closest cell and throwing us in, slamming the door behind them and locking it with the key on the wall.

They all left and closed the wooden door, but I knew that atleast two of them were standing guard outside.

•°•The Queen of Clubs' Perspective•°•

_**"I can't believe they found it.."**_ Damien said, almost in shock.

"We'll just have to dispose of it." I said, angrily.

_**"But, Dina-"**_

"But nothing!" I shouted, stomping my foot angrily.

_**"Dina.."**_


	3. Chapter 3

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

"Hmm, do you think Otetsudai might have any idea on how to get us out of here?" I asked Joisy.

"I don't think we need him," Joisy replied. "There's something snakey about these cell bars."

"Don't you mean "Fishy"?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "No, I mean snakey. Like the fireworks. If we light them, they'll become flimsy enough for us to move."

"Yes, but they'll also be freaky hot and coming towards us!" I told her.

"We'll we will just have to take our chances." She said. "I don't suppose you could become light?"

"I could try.." I told her.

I took the hoop from my pocket and stepped into it and picked it up again, turning into light. It was running out of juice.

I shot a laser at two of the bars and they began to grow, falling apart and clearing out of our path.

•°•Queen of Club's Perspective•°•

I stretched back with my head against the pillows of my circular loveseat and sighed. "Do you think those simpletons have escaped yet, Damien?" I asked him in a rather pleasant tone, reaching for a vine of grapes and holding them over my own mouth to eat.

_**"You make it sound like it would be a good thing if they escaped."**_ He observed.

I bite a grape a chewed, swallowing. It is not polite to eat with your mouth full... Of one grape. "I haven't had this much fun in a long time!" I laughed.

The red dragon's eye on his handle store at me questionably.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

"I told you I heard voices!" I whispered to Tas, (still light) pointing around the corner to The Queen and her Kris, whom she addressed as Damien.

"Are we gonna kill them?" He asked.

"Not unless we have to.." I told him. "Now go in there and cause a distraction while I try to transform!"

Tas obeyed, bouncing off the walls of the room and causing the queen to shriek.

Feeling the light of battle, I transformed.

I ran into the room and raised Otetsudai. "Queen of Clubs!" I cried, running at her.

"Metal Warrior!" She cried back, unsheathing Damien just before our swords met.

A horrible ringing sounded throughout the room. "The Kris is crying!" I cried in disbelief.

"Damien!" The Queen wailed.

_**"Leave me behind and **_**run**_**, Dina."**_ He told her.

"Never!" She slid him back into her breastplate and ran away, leaving Tas and I in the dust.

"Do we follow them?" Tas asked, stunned after what just happened.

"No," I told him, sheathing Otetsudai. "Give them time to regain themselves."


	4. Chapter 4

•°•Damien's Perspective•°•

"Oh, Damien." Dina said, submerging me in a tub of water in her room. "What's happened to you?"

"I guess I've just gone dull..." I said dryly.

"Nonsense! I haven't treated you right! I've been too rough with you.."

She began performing regular blacksmith work on me, having a small station to do such in her room.

"How do you feel?" She asked me when she had finished her work.

"Like brand new." I told her truthfully.

"Great!" She said, flopping on on her bed. She sighed. "Ahh.."

I stood up on my blade and hopped towards her and onto the bed. "Dina, I-"

"Ahh!" She shrieked.

"What's wrong?" I cried.

"You punctured the water bed." She got up and got a role of duct tape, pulling off the covers to plaster a big X onto the mattress.

"Oh. Well, what are we going to do about those simpletons? We can't live in your room forever!"

She picked me up and walked over to her bed room door, opening it. "We'll split up. Starting now!" She threw me high in the eye. I caught the light and hit the floor, sliding fast across the polished floor. I got up on my blade and watched her run the opposite direction, and I hopped down my hallway.

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

"Joisy, do you hear something?" I asked my purple furred companion.

"Yes.." She tuned her ears in. "And it sounds like.."

"Joisy, look out!" I grabbed a lifeless Kris off of the wall and clanked it against Damien's blade as he tried to sneak up on her.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"Joisy?" I turned around.

"It wasn't me! Look!" She pointed to Damien as he ran off in the direction he came from.


	5. Chapter 5

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

"Let's go after him!" I grabbed onto Joisy's hand, pulling her while running in the direction the Kris had gone in. She was much heavier in her metal armor.

We ran up to a slightly shabby looking cat. Her clothing was nothing but rags with a few playing cards messily stitched to them. "Hey, do you know where the queen is?" I asked her casually, wondering if she would actually admit anything to us.

"Yes, but it wasn't she who screamed." The girl replied.

"Well.. Then who was it..? Ace of Clubs?" Joisy asked, looking at her uniform.

"It was I," the Ace replied. "I do not like the queen. I scream because I know it will distract Damien and lead the strangers to them."

"Would you be willing to help us fight against her?" I asked.

Ace nodded. "To a certain degree!"

"Where did Damien go?" I looked around.

The Ace pointed down the hallway. "But the Queen is that way." She pointed to the hallway across from the one we were on.

"Okay. Thanks!" We turned around and ran.

•°•The Queen of Club's Perspective•°•

I stuck my foot out as the simpletons ran by, tripping the rat. I laughed and the cat reached for her Katana.

"Don't even, I just wanna talk."

She lowered her hands while the Rat got up.

"I'm sure your both wondering why your destined to die." I said, smiling.

"That would be a helpful thing to know!" The rat crossed his arms.

"You see.. I didn't always look like this... I used to be much more beautiful!'

The simpletons groaned.

"..Until a certain Ice Mage with a katana killed our mother."

Our, yes. Our..

"Valentina..?" The cat said in disbelief.

"The Bold!" I finished.

"And now I must kill you, to avenge her death."

"Yeah, except you don't have your Kris." The cat reminded me.

"That is correct!" I backed up, touching the other set of doors that lead to the garden. "Toodaloo!" I opened them, fleeing.


	6. Chapter 6

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

"Let's go!" I grabbed onto Tas and ran into the garden, after her.

"Damn it! She's gone!"

"No swearing!" Tas warned me.

"Well, we have to find her!" My heart was racing. She was going to kill us!

"Okay, Joisy. Take a deep breath with me."

We did so.

"Nao et eht owt."

"Ahh."

"Let's go find her now!"

I raced around until I found the fountain of the queen. Maybe she was hiding behind it?

I jumped behind it. Nope.

•°•THE HOLY PERSPECTIVE OF THE QUEEN OF CLUBS•°•

Heh heh heh! I crawled on the ground under my hedge of roses, being pricked by them. Dina, you naughty girl, you.

I crawled along until I was by the closest door. I jumped out and dashed in.

•°•THE HOLY PERSPECTIVE OF TAS•°•

"Did you hear that?" I asked.

Joisy's head popped up with a birdnest on it. She took it off her head and set it on the ground. "Yeah. It came from that way!"

I got up and dashed to the door with Joisy not far behind.


	7. Chapter 7

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

"Tas! Tas wake up!"

I opened my eyes and turned to Joisy.

"I think I found a way to defeat the queen," She told me, holding an ancient spell book in her hands.

"It requires using magic but I think the both of us can do it."

"Care to share this idea with me?" I asked her.

She showed me the book and pointed to a big blue car on a tightrope. "An illusion spell!"

"I'm not sure if I want to know how we're killing her with _that._"

"No!" She hit me upside the head with the book. Not too hard though, since we're friends and she didn't wanna give me a concussion like anyone else would have gotten.

She unrolled a map and placed it on the book in her lap. "There's a waterfall past here, we're gonna make a bridge. She'll fall in the water and be sucked down the waterfall."

"Hey, I get it!"

"Yeah."

"We just need these ingredients to cast the spell," She put the map in my hands. "Blue billiard chalk, googly eyes, bat wings, eye of newt, and tongue of frog."

"Gross."

"Yeah."

I looked at her. "I'll find the eye of newt and tongue of frog, you find the blue billiard chalk, googly eyes, and bat wings."

She nodded. "'Kay."

I stood up and ran off.

I walked around the empty halls of the palace. "Hmm.. I wonder what other artifacts are in here..?" I bumped into a glass case and looked up at the artifacts labeled inside.

"_Spear, sword, tongue of frog"_

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

A few minutes after Tas ran off, I went to find my items. I had double checked the list because I had one more item than Tas, but that's okay.

I heard sounds coming from a nearby open door and peered in. I saw a soldier pull her stick back before jabbing the cue ball and sinking the eight ball. She sighed and leaned her stick against the wall before coming my way. I pressed myself against the outside wall and she walked out right past me and turned the opposite direction. I took this as _my_ cue and ran in to find the chalk of many functions.

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

I cupped my chin in my hands, trying to figure out how to open the case.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

I picked up the chalk and pocketed it in my denim skirt, hoping the inside wouldn't be forever blue.

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

Still trying to figure out how to open the case.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

I ran out of the billiard room and searched around.

I could see the inside of a brightly colored room. I pressed myself against the wall once more as another toon was nearby. I heard rustling from inside and then a small black cat came out holding a coloring book with a stack of crayons on top. It was strange, she was not like the others. She was much younger, about anywhere from four to six or even seven years old. She was a black cat with ruby red eyes, and wore a white tube top and skirt. However, the pattern on her skirt and top were of red diamonds!

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

Hey, neat! There's a key on the floor. I reached down and pick it up, putting it into a lock on the door and turn it, opening it. I grab the jar on the end and run off.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

There's something odd I'm not sure I understand. It has to do with both the colors of these cats and their symbols, but also their attire.

The Queen of Clubs wears a white Breast plate in the shape club with a large black club printed on it and a "Q" in the corner, a skirt of Queen of Clubs cards, and a black transparent club on a strap on her forehead. Why would she wear a black club instead of a clear one if her fur is black? Or maybe.. It is clear after all. I am unsure.

All of the knights we've seen wore white tube tops with a large number on it and their subrace in the corner, which is strange. The queen gets a large club and a small Q, and all of the knights get a small club and a large number. What is on the front of the tube tops is also printed on the back. As for their skirts, the knights have them made out of their card, much like the queen. But more like a thong. Okay, that's nasty I take it back. But they don't have any sides, they just have the waistline and that's it.

The ace, however, had a shirt and shorts stitched out of old, darker than khaki brown colored rags stitched together with a few ace cards stitched on here and there at odd angles.

Now this young girl, of a different subrace, had black fur but a red symbol. That's strange, isn't it? I think I'm just gonna call these card people Cardians now.

By now the girl was gone, but I remember that her number was four. I duck into the room, which I know see is an arts and crafts room, and reach up for the jar of google eyes. I pulled it down off of the shelf, and I noticed a jar that read "Batwings". I looked inside of it. They were made of brown paper. I shrugged. Doesn't matter, right? I grabbed those, too.

•°•Tas's Perspective•°•

I found a guard sleeping with a newt dangling on her clothes. Huh, I thought that was only done with chameleons. I quickly snatched it off of her skirt and ran off to the spot Joisy and I were to meet, outside.

•°•

"I found the ingrediants," I told her as we met down by the river. "Do you have your's?"

She nodded, holding them in her shirt. Suddenly, flung them into the river.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" I cried, about to lunge in after them when she grabbed onto my shoulder.

"We're supposed to throw them in. Quick now!" I nodded and threw my ingredients in.

"If the legend was correct," Joisy began. "Then The Queen and Damien should already be on their way!"

"Looks like I've finally found you," A taunting voice came from behind us. As we turned around, we spotted The Queen and her Kris.

Joisy and I turned and ran, our feet gliding across the bridge that had just formed. "Come and get us," I taunted from the other side of the river.

The Queen creaked three lazy footsteps onto the bridge until she looked down. "There's never been a bridge here before! How is this even possi-" The bridge vanished beneath her feet and she fell into the river.

•°•The Queen of Club's Perspective•°•

I went under the water. It was cold, and chilly. As I resurfaced, I realized that Damien was no longer in my breastplate.

"Damien! Damien!" I cried. "N-No!" I reached up to the sky as the river's edge came and I fell down the water fall. "Nooo!" And my screams disappeared and faded with the fog.

•°•Joisy's Perspective•°•

"What The Queen didn't realize was that questioning the illusions existence destroyed it," I explained.

Tas turned and pointed. "Hey! That black and white tiled forest, I think it leads to the way out!"

"Well my goodness, let's find out. We can't stay here much longer." We turned, leaving.

•°•

_The ebony wearer of the regal clovers has been demolished, but a villainess with a diamond eye awaits. Those who love stories, gather 'round._


End file.
